The Magic of Being Alone

You deserve alone time, you NEED alone time,even if it means turning on the TV for the kids and locking yourself in the bathroom for a few minutes each day or handing the kids to Dad and going for a 10 minute walk. Trade with another mom. FIND THE TIME

To often I hear moms who are stressed to the max because they never take a time out. A few minutes alone each day would shift their whole perspective.

I used to have a hard time being alone. First because I became a mom so young(2 by 16, yeah thats another story) that everything I did from school to work I had companions in my boys. They were like a security blanket. I was so shy and self condos that having they boys as a distraction and an excuse worked well for me. I didn’t have to deal with allot of stuff because I was always busy caring for my children.

Being alone was uncomfortable. I didnt know what to do with myself. My thoughts were chaotic. I didnt like myself much. So I was quick to find something to do, someone to be with.

Then as I begin my healing journey, I met a woman who said “be with yourself, listen to yourself and you will heal in leaps and bounds” I have to say I rolled my eyes and went on with my life, seeking healing treatments that did make a difference but still I hated to be alone.

Then my husband and I had a weekend together planned and farmed out the kids ( 4 at the time)  but he was called into work and I was left alone.

 I cleaned the house.

I organized my desk.

I called all my friends.

 I read.

I paced.

I was bored and antsy.

I didnt know what to do with myself.

I turned on the radio to drown out the thoughts in my head.

I tried to watch tv but with poor reception and only 3 station, that distraction didnt work. Thank Goodness too because I think if I had access to all the channels available to me now I would have distracted myself into never knowing ME.

After the first night I had exhausted all distractions.

The next morning I woke and I felt a resolve to JUST BE.’

Just be myself, not as a mom, a caregive  a wife, a daughter, a sister.

In silence my thoughts started to come together.

Feeling came to the surface. Memories flowed

I spent the day listening to myself. Was I hungry? Tired?

Not following a schedule set to be effective with a family of 6. Liberating!

 I had no one but myself to care for. What a new thought!

In that day I discover I was good company. That I  felt satisfaction caring for myself.

I was renewed and re-energized.

When my husband and kids returned I was blissful. I promised myself I would take time for myself everyday.

It wasnt easy, My husband worked out of town , leaving Sunday night, returning Friday.

Kids were 7,9,2,1.

Three were adopted and has some not so fun issues,liking hoarding food, holes in the walls and hitting.

My girl Ana was less then a year and cried ALL the time and rarely slept..

I lived on five ac. far from a town and had a car that wasn’t so dependable.

So I had lots of excuses WHY I didnt have the time or resources for alone time.

But after that weekend alone, my time and resources seemed to magically appeared.

I cant say I was 100 % alone since my children where always close by. But going outside and soaking up the sun or moon is so refreshing. Sitting alone under a tree. Taking a cat nap. Writing out thoughts and ideas down. Allowed my to learn who I am.

10 minutes every day to myself has created HOURS of a calm, effective mom that can manage a dozen kids with a smile. Ok I have worked it to 30 minutes during the day. Sometimes I get interrupted but for the most part all my kids understand that mom taking a time out means a calm mom, full of hugs and kisses that is way better then the bad mood momma ,who is impatient and focused on getting it all done.

I have discovered an amazing best friend who is always looking out for my higher good. The ability to be on my own has released amazing ideas and solutions in my life.

It has also taught me to allow my kids private alone time. Which used to be a huge challenge in a 2 bedroom house with 6 kids. Now it a lil easier with 3 bedrooms and only 5 kids. lol

I challenage you to committe 10 minutes everyday to YOURSELF.

Listen to my free guided relaxation ( www.BanishtheBadMoodMomma.com ) , as a way to start.

I’m betting you will uncover a dynamic, energetic woman who knows how to live her life for her highest good in home, work, and world.

Tell me about your need for alone time, or fear of being alone.What things do you do to create alone time for yourself? Or avoid it?